Title: Camp Cuddly Pines Powertool Massacre

Also Known As:

Year: 2005

Genre: Horror / Comedy / Porn

Language: English

Runtime: 151 min

Director: Jonathan Morgan

Writer: N/A

IMDB: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0494318

A group of college students, Kirsten, Meghan, Rayford, Todd and Josh are on their way to a concert when they run over a drifter, do to being side tracked by having sex. Unfortuntely for them, their troubles are only just starting when they have to stop at a local camp site because of car troubles, only to find out the woods are home to a deformed psycho killer. Who will survive and how much of their clothes will they still be wearing?

Our thoughts:
I was sitting here thinking about commenting on the bad aspects of the movie, like how ridiculous that these people are running for their lives, but will stop to have sex. Then again, the one thought that kept running through my head was, "Man this is bad, but it is just a porno afterall."

Unlike the "Fantom Kiler" flicks that try to be horror movies first and skin flicks second, Camp Cuddly Pines knows that it's purpose is of a porno and not a horror movie. The horror element is there just to help make it different, and undoubtably because the people behind the camera are horror fans themselves.

The humor plays out in a parody fashion, so we get the cliched horror character. You'll find the jocks, the nerd, the bad girl, the dumb blonde cheerleader, the creepy old man who gives us the background on the killer and of course the inept Sheriff. When the movie isn't dishing out the typical, lame parody gags, the humor is still pretty bad through out. Though I won't lie, there were moments where the movie got a laugh or two out of me. Hell, I'll even admit that the killer's look was actually rather cool and, would watch a horror movie or even another porno-horror with him in it, aslong as he wasn't partaking in the sex scenes (he was one ugly sumbitch).

What's that you say? "What about kills? Is there any gore in it?" Yes, people get killed in the movie, but everything happens off screen so you either get to see the shadows of the person being killed, or what's happening is out of frame. The the killer and or the victim, are getting splashed with blood and, that is about it, in terms of gore. Nothing that'll put a damper on "happy time" like say, the penis eating scene from "Porn Of The Dead", but if your expecting some gore with your porn you won't find it here.

Sure it's not something I'd actually consider to be a "good" movie but for it's purpose it works, and stands out as one of the better horror-porno's I've seen. While I didn't find it particularly funny, I have a feeling this movie will work for the people who choose to watch it and will be entertained in more ways that one.

Positive things:
- An actual decent killer.
- While a parody, the story isn't half bad.
- Works both as a movie and as adult entertainment.
Negative things:
- Pretty much what you'd expect from horror-porn.

Gore: 1/5
Nudity: 5/5
Story: 3/5
Effects: 2/5
Comedy: 3/5

We bought this movie from:

Reviewed by:


Like us on Facebook

Best of 2017
"City of Rott: Streets of Rott" Press Release
Best of 2016
Best of 2015
Underrated Horror Movies That Aren't Underrated: A Halloween List
Howling: Halloween 2015
Amityville: Halloween 2015
A Stephen King Halloween for 2015
"Tales of the Dim" Press Release
Best of 2014
Full Moon Favorites
A '90s Halloween
Best of 2013
A Profane Preview
A Netflix Halloween for 2013
"German Angst" on Kickstarter
The Sexploitation/Erotica List
Ronny's Arthouse Films List #2
Best of 2012
Worst of 2012

Special Feature Archives

1. Okja
2. Lucky
3. 68 Kill
4. Prevenge
5. Shin Godzilla
6. Good Manners
7. Love and Other Cults
8. Get Out
9. It Comes At Night
10. November
Taken from Best of 2017

- Mondo Vision
- Second Run DVD