Two rebellious girls leave for a month to work at a farm, so they can get some money for a massive shopping weekend in New York. Unfortunately they never make it to the farm before they're abducted by two brothers, and get locked in containers out in the woods, only to be used for prostitution.
When you go into a movie titled "Even Lambs Have Teeth", with a plot about two girls who get abducted, you can pretty much see the entire movie before your eyes. The review might get into some spoiler area, but I'd argue that you already know what happens. They obviously don't hide the fact that these girls will fight back, but the question is what other surprises the movie could have in store? Imagine my surprise that there is in fact nothing to surprise you in the entire movie, except perhaps that it is a lot more light-hearted and comedic in its first and third act (the part where they're being used for sex isn't particularly funny, nor played off that way).
Katie and Sloane are getting ready for a huge shopping weekend in New York, by leaving to work at a farm to gather as much money as possible before their quick adventure. To spice it up a bit, they want to leave their identities at home, in hopes that they can get into some fun situations at the farm, with their new identities - Ripley and Heather. When they're dropped off by the bus by Katie's uncle, who is an FBI agent, they still have some time before the next bus arrives and want to go check out the little village. At a small coffee shop they meet two brothers who offer them a ride to the farm. The girls happily agree to their offer. Of course, the brothers have other plans.
The first act of the movie plays out like a chick flick in pretty much every way. It's extremely light-hearted and silly, the comedy is innocently sexual with plenty of innuendos, and they (Sloane especially) prove that they're airheads. This vibe continues up until they arrive at the psycho's place, and the comedy comes back around the time that they escape. While I can get behind the idea of a rape-revenge movie that is about two girls fighting back in an over-the-top bad ass and smart way, it somehow felt weird how many plot holes "Even Lambs Have Teeth" completely left out in the open. First of all, the girls did not come off as very smart, but when they're out for revenge they seem to be able to not only find everyone involved, but also kill them all off without leaving a single trace.
The most stupid moment for me was when they wanted it all to look like it was one of the bad guys killing everyone before ending his own life with a gun. But they left him with two holes in his head. I am not sure how he could have shot himself twice in the head, and I'm sad to say that it did not play off as a joke in the movie. That's not the kind of comedy the movie had (it was more about its vibe). But obviously this went over well, because they didn't seem to be in any problem about it all, not even being questioned. Fine, the movie is sometimes more dumb than the girls in the movie, but that's just how they decided to make the movie. They only seemed to care about making a movie where two pretty girls in skimpy clothes, covered in blood, get to seek bloody revenge in a very over-the-top way. Unfortunately that is all there is to it.
What makes the movie watchable is probably that it was an easy watch. Despite a few scenes while they were being abducted being of a darker nature, the movie felt like it just wanted to be entertaining. When the revenge is nearly as long as the event leading up to it, you know that the plan wasn't to drown you in a dark subject, but rather let you feel the pleasure of revenge. The lead characters, played by Tiera Skovbye and Kirsten Prout, manage to help this chick flick meets rape-revenge movie come to life. At times they're extremely annoying, but ultimately they are part of what makes this movie even remotely worth the watch. "Even Lambs Have Teeth" works as a sunday movie, where you just don't want to care about anything. It requires no thought or brain activity from you, because the moment you think about it, you realize how predictable and dumb the movie is. Whether you can leave your brain by the door as you watch this or not is up to you.