It's 2027 and Atro City is just like any other city where robots live side by side with humans and everything seems perfectly fine. That is until a certain pest-control robot has a short circuit and decides to start butchering up all the naked and half-naked women of the city. Now it's up to a certain robotic detective to solve the mystery of these ritualistic killings and stop the deranged robot before he kills all the women in Atro City.
I am ashamed of my own arrogance. I thought I had seen it all. I thought I had seen everything there was to see. I thought cinema had given me all she had to offer. I was so very wrong. Only now can I look back at my cinephile existence with regret and remorse but also look to the future with a new vision brought on by this state of clarity. I can only imagine this moment must be what it feels like for those who fall in love or find faith in a higher power, whatever it might be. It's an overwhelming sensation that makes me wish I would have known and seen Clive Cohen's "Exterminator City" sooner in my life.
In 2027, robots live amongst humans freely but one particular robot pest controller blows a fuse and is now on a murderous rampage, hacking up and mutilating all the beautiful women in Atro City. Now a hard boiled and a hard wired robot detective is desperate to bring the crazed robot in and with the help of a robot psychologist, it might be possible. The two have no idea how deep the madness runs with the killer-bot and will be dragged into a metaphysical nightmare that they might not be able to escape from themselves.
"Exterminator City" is possibly one of the most fascinating backyard movies that I've seen that was completely horrendous. I came across it on eBay and purchased it as a blind buy not knowing what it was or what it contained. I didn't watch it immediately but I decided to give it a spin on a rainy day and I was transfixed for the entire 90 minutes and I was filled with a mix of emotions after it was over. I hated it and loved it. It was perplexing but completely ridiculous. It seemed like one of the shittiest backyard movies I had seen but there appeared to be a psychotic brilliance to it as well.
It's a one-man movie that was built by taking a handful of scenes and then repeating them over and over again. In this case, the scenes were: robots, robots having hallucinations, naked women, kill scenes and then a scene of a toy car on fishing wire being swung in front of model buildings. By normal standards it's obviously a terrible movie and the sensible part of my brain acknowledged this but somewhere in between the redundancy and the idiocy was something that I found somewhat enjoyable, and dare I say, likable, about "Exterminator City". Maybe it was the titties or maybe it was for the...
No, it was probably the titties. Regardless, there was something there. An idea. A concept. A vision! It just was not executed very well. Or at least it doesn't come off as being very well made if you compare it to anything else, but if you do, then it still basically remains as a brilliant piece of shit. It's as if Clive managed to find that tiny space that exists between an arthouse movie and a piece of z-grade trash that nobody would want to or should own.
A majority of the movie is spent showing these charmingly cheap looking robot puppets (still deserves credit for making them, regardless of quality) participating in dialogue exchanges that are both boring and laughably terrible. Then the rest of the movie is spent with one of the largest collections of b-movie and porn-star actresses I've seen put together for one movie. Of course, they are in the movie to either be naked or to be killed. Basically, like any other b-movie. The nudity is great and all but it's the bizarre hallucinations that the killer robot has that makes the movie a self-loathing treat.
Scenes featuring a talking bible, squished bugs mutating into large gooey piles of guts and even having Satan himself (who kind of looks like Hitler) show up and orders the robot to keep on killing to achieve his (the robot's) goal. I don't remember what that goal was since my brain melted at one point during the movie. Not like it matters anyway. Some movies aren't meant to be understood and "Exterminator City" is one of those movies. Anyway, these strange scenes, oddly, make the movie. It's where it feels like there was actually some sort of competence behind "Exterminator City" and that there's in fact a reason for everything. Then it cuts to a scene of a flying to car (that acts as a transition between every scene in the movie) and bare boobies. After that, the movie goes back to feeling like utter nonsense.
"Exterminator City" is indeed this very strange movie that creates inner turmoil for those who aren't smart enough to acknowledge the movie for what it is: a crappy backyard movie. "Exterminator City" is everything a movie shouldn't be: it's cheap, stupid, recycles a handful of scenes, goes on for far too long and stumbles along trying to go from a beginning to an ending. Imagine a drunken child being spun around and then forced to walk from one end of a room to the other. That's about what it's like watching this movie try to go from A to B. Yet somehow there managed to be an idea that was buried underneath nudity and crappy robot puppets that seemed interesting and that just maybe it's not as terrible as it seems. Then again, the magic of watching "Exterminator City" does wear off with repeated viewings and comes off as nothing more than an awful mess of a home production. But "Exterminator City" and I will always have the memory of that first viewing experience, and no one can take that away from us.
And on that note, in honor of Joe Bob Briggs, I kindly steal his schtick and bring you…
Film Bizarro's Drive-In Totals for "Exterminatory City":
- 13 Scenes of naked women
- 5 Scenes of naked women shot using infrared
- 12 Scenes of scantily clad women
- 4 Scenes of crappy animal puppet mutilations
- 1 Robot dog puppet
- 1 Unexplained talking boars head
- 1 Giant demonic snake
- 1 Hitler demon
- 1 Scene of demon-on-robot rape
- 1 Scene of the best-shittiest robot sword fights ever produced for a movie
- 85 Individual shots of crappy model buildings and a flying toy car
…At some point I blacked out and forgot to count all the individual scenes of hallucinations so I'll just say that there were a fucking lot of 'em.