Title: Monsterwolf

Also known as:
Firefight (Original title)

Year: 2010

Genre: Horror

Language: English

Runtime: 86 min

Director: Todor Chapkanov

Writer: Charles Bolon

IMDb: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1535608/


Plot:
An oil company unleashes an old Indian curse when they try to blow up a weird artifact. This curse sets a hungry wolf free and it will kill everyone involved with letting it free. In this case it's the oil company Holter Ex, who already are in a fight against an Indian chief about their drilling. A woman returns to her hometown to work on the case as a lawyer.

Our thoughts:
I am happy to say that living in Sweden has kept me away from the SyFy Channel (but I would've loved it as a kid), but being a horror fan has obviously made me watch a couple of them still. Films like "Alien Apocalypse", "Abominable" and "Frankenfish" are titles I'd class as the good ones (read: better ones), but everyone knows that they have produced some serious shitfests and there is no stopping them. "Monsterwolf" doesn't classify as their worst, not by miles, but it's not good either so my guess is that it lays somewhere between their best and worst. Hadn't it been for the blatantly stupid title I would never have watched it to begin with, especially when the original title might be the most uninteresting title to ever be given to a horror movie ("Firefight"). When the bad title is what draws you in, what can you expect? To make this review a more pleasurable experience for myself (sitting with a headache right now), I am going to write the review as a fake interview with the creators of the film. If you made this film, don't take it personally, you just didn't make a very good movie. Note that the following might not be facts.

Why did you put so many things into the plot when all we care about is seeing a monster kill people?
Well you see, the reason that this movie has a monster, romcom influences, Indian myths, terrible lawyer dramas, bad-ass-beyond-silliness black assassins, actors with Hollywood looks and last but not least practical AND CGI effects is because we wanted this to be a movie worth watching, no matter your taste. We have a little something for everyone.

I don't see anything wrong with that, except that you failed to deliver on almost all of those. Why did you mix practical and CGI effects? That made the experience so much worse and you would've won fans over if you only went with practical.
It was easy to just do the close-up shots with practical make-up but we're way too shitty to make something worthwhile for the full body shots, so we just said "Fuck it" and let some random intern make CGI effects for us. Thinking about it, I don't even think he was working with the effects department. Fuck it!

I still think you should've stuck with only make-up. Bad make-up is better than good CGI.
You bitch be crazy!

Hmm.. Enough about that then. Why did you decide to throw in animations when the Indian chief told stories? And then have it screen on what appeared to be a stone wall to give it an older look.
Wait, what? I didn't agree on that! You're kidding? That's ridiculous.

No, it's there. It's fucking stupid too, I swear!
No wonder people don't like this movie! At least now I know it's not MY fault.

Well, I mean.. I don't want to be rude but those scenes might've been stupid but have you seen the rest of the film? It's no "The Howling".
What is this howler-thingy you speak of?

A movie.. Nevermind. What can you tell us about the title change?
I originally wanted the movie to be called "Firefight" to, yet again, draw more people in. Some people might watch a trailer and see a monster wolf in it, some might see the Indian chief, but then some people might only hear the title and think it's a firefighter drama and say to their spouse "Oh, it might be as good as "Backdraft", let's check this one out!". But then I remembered we didn't have Kurt Russell, so we just went with whatever we saw on screen when watching our film, which was a monsterwolf. But I mean, it's not really a monster. Maybe we should've called it "Spiritwolf". What do you think?

Maybe. It's more accurate, but I'm sure this title is good enough. It's already out and stuff.
No, no, I'll call my management, no problem!

Alright, fine. Fuck off and thanks for taking your time to not being interviewed by us in this fake interview.
My pleasure! Keep a look out for my upcoming movie "Vampyre Nation", but it has no vampires! It's all about luring people in!

Okay, sorry everyone for this silliness, but it speaks volumes of the movie. It's watchable if you feel you have to watch a SyFy movie, but it doesn't bring much of worth. It could've been alright if they stuck with the wolf story and practical effects, and scrapped the rest.


Positive things:
- Writing this interview made me forget about my headache.


Negative things:
- I don't care.

Rating:
Gore: 1/5
Nudity: 0/5
Story: 1/5
Effects: 1/5
Comedy: 1/5

We got this movie from:
CinematicVision.com

It can be bought from:
DiscShop.se

Reviewed by:
Ronny




 

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