In the town of, It Had To Be, the cheerleader school is reopened after it was closed down for many years do to the number of cheerleaders who were killed. Too bad at the same time there is a prison riot, where a convicted serial killer manages to escape, as well as a psycho who escapes from the insane asylum. None of which will detour Bambi from turning her group of misfit teens, into some of the best cheerleaders around. Atleast that's what she thinks.
It's no secret I hate parody movies, especially horror ones. Very rarely do I believe that the parody style works, (outside of Mel Brooks) about the only one that comes to mind that is horror is "Bloodbath At The House of Death," but that had more to do with the fact that it mixed in plenty of original jokes as well as parody ones. Compared to the "Scary Movie" flicks which are truly some of the most awful movies ever made. Given that, I didn't think there was going to be anything worse than those movies, then I found "Pandemonium" and was proven wrong.
Yes, we know, we all know that more often than not the things that go down in a horror movie are fairly stupid or silly. What we don't need though, is a movie taking those same stupid moments and amplifying them, which is suppose to some how make it more funny. The problem is, we know they are dumb and often times we the viewers are making the same jokes that movies like "Pandemonium" and "Scary Movie" make. So what is the point of watching a movie being dumb and making the jokes we are already making ourselves?
Since "Pandemonium" is poking fun at horror movies, particularly slashers, it's obvious how the story is going to play out. Hell you even know what jokes they are going to make before they do them. So already, the movie is as redundant as it is stupid. The characters in here are the typical stock characters that you'd expect. The ditsy sex-crazed teens who are introduced as victim one, two, three, etc. Which is as hilarious as it is brilliant. Then of course there is the sheriff who is tracking down the killer and is also usually pretty inept to what is actually going on but they changed it up a bit. Instead of a sheriff, we get a Canadian Mountie running around on a horse. Ah, so funny! Of course we are also given the weirdo(s) who warn everyone of the impending doom that awaits them (naturally no one listens) and a random collection of forgettable characters that show up for a joke or two, then are gone.
The writers are also kind enough to include red herrings with having an escaped convict and an insane asylum patient cross paths and ride together in a car to the town where the cheerleader camp is. Then there was a joke in there about the killer turning people into furniture, not exactly sure why (it was probably explained about the same time I was trying to kill myself because I couldn't take it anymore) besides being able to make the cheap joke. Of having the "sheriff" Cooper, along with fellow officer Johnson (played by Pee Wee Herman) looking at a night stand, that was once a woman, and having Johnson, open the drawers only to have Cooper scream, "What do you think you're doing?!" Which, naturally was followed by, "I was just trying to get into her drawers, sir!"
I am aware that I'm really doing nothing more than just bashing and attacking this movie. Well I can't help it, for one I'm just a bitter person from watching this movie, two it is to stupid for words, and three there isn't anything in here worth giving the movie a compliment for. Other than the fact that Pee Wee Herman is in it. Obviously if you like mindless comedy or parody movies, you'll like this or if you are like me, then I'd suggest you stay away. Far away.